Aprons and Olive Oil
by Begger4mcgregor
Summary: Alan and Eric discover who wears the apron in their relationship.  EricxAlan.  Humor/Romance/Smut.
1. Dinner

_**A.N. **__Yet more smut from me! This fic was inspired by another conversation on my Black Butler forum about Eric and Alan cooking. I said I thought it would be funny if Eric were secretly a good cook while the more effeminate Alan was rubbish at it. My mind kind of went out of control with the idea. _

_This either takes place before the musical, or in some alternate wonderful universe where Eric and Alan didn't die "the most beautiful death in the WORLD!". Not quite as angsty as typical fics for this pairing, because I am of the firm belief that when things are going well, these two would be so much fun together! They're always teasing and flirting, and I wanted to play with that aspect of their relationship._

_This story graphically depicts MalexMale sex. Don't like, don't read. I do not own Kuroshitsuji, otherwise William would have taken Eric back after the opera, taken away his deathscythe in favor of a toothbrush, given him a lifetime of overtime and allowed Eric and Alan to go on cuddling and singing about flowers forever..._

_Please forgive Eric's potty mouth and ample usage of the lord's name in vain!_

_You can thank my Kindle for beta-ing this for me! It's hilarious hearing the robotic computer voice reading raunchy gay sex scenes aloud!_

* * *

Eric Slingby jumped as a log settling in the fireplace startled him from his intense staring match with the dancing flames. He and his partner had been working on their mission reports for _hours_ now, and Eric's attention span had clearly reached it's limit. "Gaaaah! Kill me now Alan!" he moaned as he laid his head on the report, wishing it would write itself.

Alan rolled his eyes and smiled fondly, lightly kicking his companion under the coffee table the two were currently huddled around. "Oh quit it you big baby, we're nearly done!" he chuckled.

Eric grumbled, but did as he was told. He supposed he should be thankful for Alan's dogged determination, otherwise Eric would no doubt be putting off this report tonight, and getting overtime tomorrow as a result. Sitting in Alan's cozy little flat in front of the toasty fire, with the promise of dinner on the horizon no less, was infinitely better than wasting away in his cubical any day! Still, the location didn't make writing up his mission report any less boring. Eric sighed loudly and popped his neck. Last page.

Glancing out of the corner of his eye for anything to distract him, Eric glimpsed Alan hard at work on his own report. Alan really was much better at this kind of thing. Being punctual, professional, getting all his paperwork done on time, everything that a good shinigami should be. Everything Eric was not. Eric's only strength seemed to lie in fighting, hurting… killing, and what kind strength was that really? It disgusted him sometimes how used to it he had become, how he could even revel in it. Alan, he was the truly strong one. Eric sometimes wanted to punch his co-workers in the face, and occasionally did just that, when they would imply Alan was weak.

There was no more bleak prognosis for a shinigami than the Thorns of Death. It weakened the body and held it hostage, it's host knowing that at any moment the disease could take hold, without any way to stop or slow it's deadly progress. Eric knew if he were in Alan's shoes, he would be a bitter and hateful man, jealous of all those that could live normally, jealous of those who took their lives for granted. Not Alan. Alan was quick to laugh, and even quicker to smile or help out someone in need. He always put everyone before himself without asking anything in return. Despite the horrible lot he had been dealt, Alan played his hand with more dignity and pure _joy_ for life than anyone Eric had ever met. If that wasn't strength, Eric sure as hell didn't know what was.

Realizing he was flat out gazing fondly at the other man, entranced as the firelight brought out chestnut and golden hues in his hair, Eric coughed and quickly brought his eyes back to his report.

After finishing up a paragraph, Alan's eyes glanced up to see Eric struggling to concentrate. He really was impressed he'd lasted this long. Eric made no allusions about his hatred for paperwork. No, Eric's talents lie on the streets of London, deathscythe in hand, feral grin on his handsome features. Alan blushed slightly as the word handsome entered into his mind at the thought of Eric.

He knew Eric was handsome, and funny, and kind, and… _everything_ to him, but those were dangerous thoughts. _Eric is my best friend! What if he doesn't feel the way I do? …I'll lose him._ Alan would never let that happen if he could help it. If friendship was all Eric could give him, then Alan would gladly take it. Any time he could spend with Eric was precious, even if it was simply filling out paperwork on his coffee table. Shaking thoughts of Eric's attractiveness from his head, Alan brought his eyes back to his report, finished up the last paragraph and stretched his arms high above his head.

"Finally! That mission really was a bureaucratic nightmare eh? Well, I promised you dinner didn't I? Why don't I start while you finish up?" Alan asked cheerfully.

"You sure you don't want any help?" Eric replied, looking longingly at the kitchen… at anything to get him away from his report.

"No, you're the guest! Plus… I can see… 3 spelling errors in that paragraph alone." The brunette answered, looking apologetic as he peered over the other man's shoulder and pointed out his errors.

Eric rolled his eyes. "You're worst than Spears!" he exclaimed, smirking afterward to show he was teasing.

"Better him than Sutcliff! Lord knows what would happen if we all behaved like him!" Alan laughed as he made his way to the kitchen.

Eric's eyebrows shot up in horror as he visualized he and his co-workers made up like street walkers, prancing around in bright crimson coats and wigs. Shuddering, he went back to proof reading his report.

Now that he was in the kitchen, Alan's anxiety was rising. He normally was a relatively calm person, especially when you considered the fear he had to live with daily. Would today be his last? Would today be the day the thorns wrapped around his heart for good, snuffing out his life in the blink of an eye?

No such thoughts were welcome in the brunette's mind. Alan did not, _would_ not, let fear of his illness control his life, however little there may be left. There was too much to live for, too much he still had to do, to worry about something he couldn't control. No, it was not the Thorns of Death that currently worried the reaper… it was quite simply… his cooking.

He didn't know what he was thinking when he suggested they finish their reports at his place, home made dinner included! Well, he _did_ know what he was thinking, and that had been spending time with Eric, but did it have to involve cooking? Alan had never been good at the culinary arts. There was just something about the slap dash nature of cooking that baffled him. A pinch of this, a dab of that, how was one supposed the know what that meant? Alan preferred clear precise instructions, which he could then follow to the letter and have some measure of success. Cooking seemed to be more art than science unfortunately. He could bake you up a mean plate of cookies, but the cordon bleu was best left to someone else.

Alan glanced longingly toward the living room. Surely Eric was done by now, perhaps he could take him up on his offer. No, Eric was his guest, and he would not be made to make his own meal! Not to mention Eric was _always_ rescuing him. Alan tried not to be offended or hurt when Eric would inevitably tag along on his soul collection missions. He knew that Eric only did it out of concern, and if he were honest with himself, Alan had to admit he would do the same for Eric were their situations reversed. He wasn't really angry with Eric, or anyone else for thinking him weak, he was angry at the weakness in himself.

He _tried_ to keep up, to prove he could be just as good as his colleagues, but he knew it was likely only a matter of time until he was taken off active duty and put behind a desk. Unconsciously gripping his shirt above his heart, Alan cursed how unfair it all was! Realizing where his thoughts were headed, he scolded himself as he dropped his hand to his side. There was no use in all this self pity! It wouldn't cure him, it wouldn't slow it down, it would only make him and those he loved miserable!

Alan took a calming breath and softly smiled. Today had been a good day. This whole week in fact. He had been feeling quite well, his missions had gone smoothly, and now Eric was here to share dinner with him… dinner! Oh God… _You can do this Alan! Start with the basics!_ Alan took a steadying breath, got out the ingredients and started to prep for dinner.

Without the calming rhythm of Alan's pen scratching away next to him, Eric found it almost impossible to focus! Alan always seemed to motivate him, whether it be by lightly nagging him to do his paper work, or by doing much more subtle, much more important things to spur Eric into action. Alan was so unfailingly kind and impossibly strong in the face of life's cruelty that it made Eric re-evaluate himself time and again. He made him want to be better, more trusting, honest, friendly… happy. _Alan_ made him happy.

Eric had long ago given up on caring about anyone, and had nearly forgotten what happiness felt like. Having been disappointed and let down enough in his long life, he had given up entirely, opting to live with his loneliness instead. It was like a wall of ice around him, keeping everyone out… until Alan had come along and utterly demolished that wall with the warmth of his smile.

_Oh Jesus Eric, now you've gone poetic?_ Eric mentally berated himself and sighed, resting his head on his nearly finished report. It really was as finished as it was going to get, being so thoroughly distracted by his increasingly romantic musings about his partner. Eric mentally scolded himself for being such a damn _girl_! Alan was his friend, and he'd be damned if he screwed that up! Alan was all he had. Running a hand through his hair, he started putting away his pen and papers when he heard a distressed yelp come from the other room.

"Alan!" Eric shouted as he rushed to the kitchen. Was it the Thorns of Death? Was he all right? As he rounded the corner, preparing for the worst, he could only stand flabbergasted at what he saw. There was Alan, glasses askew and a whisk in hand, standing in front of the stove, which held a skillet currently billowing black smoke.

"Ah, Eric! Ha… how's the report coming?" Alan stammered, beet red with embarrassment.

Eric tried desperately not to laugh at Alan's mortified expression. "What the hell are you doing in here? What are you making?" he asked incredulously as he raised an eyebrow, trying to contain his laughter.

"Steak?"

A bark of laughter escaped regardless of his efforts to contain it. "Steak? With a _whisk_?" Eric lost the battle and cracked up.

"This?" Alan held up the offending kitchen utensil with a confused expression. "For the… rice?"

Eric positively lost it at that comment. Clutching his sides and gasping for breath, he managed to reply. "Rice… a whisk! Oh God Alan, you don't have any idea how to cook do you?"

Alan looked ashamed as he stammered his answer. "I… well… no. No I can't… at all. I guess that kind of puts a crimp in the dinner plans. Sorry." He finished with a small apologetic smile.

Eric ruffled Alan's hair affectionately as his laughter began to die down. _It really should be illegal to be so damned adorable._ "Don't worry about it. I told you I'd help you." He smiled reassuringly.

The taller man surveyed the kitchen. He saw some wild rice in a pot with water. Way too much water in fact. Eric picked up the pan, dumped the excess water in the sink and returned it to the heat. There were carrots boiling in a separate pot, which he turned down slightly so it wouldn't boil over. That left the steak. Raising an eyebrow at the blackened pan, Eric turned to Alan. "You heated the pan and _then_ put in the oil didn't you?"

"Oh… was I not supposed to?" Eric's smirk was all Alan needed for confirmation. "I'm hopeless in the kitchen." Alan sighed and laughed lightly. The situation _was_ rather funny, no matter how he looked at it.

Eric frowned in contemplation. "This is going to splatter grease everywhere. Have you got an apron?"

"Hmmm… I _think_ so, but you're not going to like it…" was Alan's enigmatic reply.

Eric shrugged. _It's just an apron, what's not to like?_ His internal query was answered as Alan returned with… it. The most pink, frilly, girly monstrosity that Eric had ever laid eyes on. "You're joking." He deadpanned.

"Afraid not, though it is pretty funny!" Alan giggled, already imagining Eric wearing it. "It's all I have though. I never use it because it's… well…"

"Gay as a fruitcake?"

"Pretty much."

"Why on earth do you even _have_ that?" Eric asked incredulously.

"Don't you remember the Christmas party a few years back? We had a white elephant gift exchange?" Alan prompted, waiting for Eric's memories to kick in.

Eric eyed the apron warily. "… I was probably drunk by that time wasn't I?"

"Yes, yes you probably were come to think. Well, like it or not, this is all I have, take it or leave it!" Alan smirked, sure that Eric would never consider…

"Give it here!" the taller man grumbled, his ears turning red from embarrassment as he scowled and put on the apron.

Alan was fighting valiantly to keep his laughter in check. "Ffff… it uh… ffffff… looks cute on you Eric…" he said as his giggles finally won the battle.

_Cute?_ Eric Slingby considered himself many things, _cute_ was not one of them, though his heartbeat sped up at Alan's comment none the less. "Oh shut up and cut some bread!" Eric snapped with no real malice, a full fledged blush coloring his cheeks.

For a short while they worked in comfortable silence. Well, as comfortable a silence as one can enjoy while wearing a short frilly pink apron, cooking steak and being quietly laughed at. In short order the rice was cooked, the carrots buttered and the steaks prepared. Eric quickly ripped off the apron and tossed it on the counter, grabbed a plate and headed to the living room, Alan close behind him. Alan's flat was too small for a proper dining room, so they made do with the low coffee table in front of the fireplace they had previously been using to write their reports. Both being bachelors, the meager accommodations didn't seem to bother either of them.

The meal was simple, just the way Eric liked it. He had never been one for fancy frills and things, just give him some meat and veg and he was a happy man. Eric was also fairly certain that if Alan had attempted to make something more complicated, he may well have burned the house down.

"I'm really sorry you had to come and save me like that Eric! I really am completely hopeless in the kitchen!" Alan smiled at his companion, genuinely apologetic. "This is delicious by the way!"

"It's no big deal. You should have just told me from the start you couldn't cook." Eric mumbled, embarrassed at the praise for his rather feminine hobby.

"Well you never told me you could cook!" Alan exclaimed, looking impressed.

Eric chuckled softly, "It's a well kept secret, so guard it with your life." He finished with a conspiratorial wink.

"Oh, but of course!" Alan replied with mock-seriousness before adopting a more genuine expression. "Really though, thanks for saving dinner for us." He said softly, the tips of his ears turning red.

Eric smiled fondly. "You're welcome, though I can't take all the credit. You did plan the meal after all, and did all the prep work."

"Haha, I suppose that's true." Alan smiled warmly. "We always seem to be good at completely opposite things don't we?"

"That's what makes us such a great team."

"The best" Alan breathed in agreement. For a moment nothing needed to be said, both men simply enjoying the closeness of the other, watching the firelight play with the shadows in the darkening room.


	2. Dessert

Eric was in trouble. In the quiet intimacy of the tiny living room, Alan's close proximity and warm smile was almost too much for him to bear. As he stole glances at the other man, the soft light of the fire illuminating Alan's perfect features and stunning eyes, Eric wanted nothing more than to reach across the small table and kiss the other man senseless. Eric fought down a blush at his rebellious thoughts and quickly brought his attention back to his plate.

Much of the meal went on in comfortable silence. A few quiet words were exchanged here and there. Talk of their friends at the office… teasing Alan a bit more about his cooking… teasing Eric a _lot_ more about that apron.

As the evening wore down and both men were clearly finished, the atmosphere became slightly awkward. The reports were written, the dinner eaten, now was traditionally the time for Eric to take his leave. Alan thought frantically for some excuse to invite the other man to stay longer. _Would you like to play chess? Wait… Eric always says he hates chess…go for a walk? No… it's raining! …stay and make love to me all night long? Oh good Lord Alan! _Nearly choking as his train of thought ran wildly out of control, Alan cleared his throat and gathered their plates. "I'll just take these to the kitchen." He said cheerfully, hoping Eric hadn't suddenly gained the ability to read his mind.

Raising an eyebrow at Alan's sudden cough, Eric followed the smaller man to the kitchen. "I'll help you with those." Eric offered, hoping for any reason to stay a little longer, to keep the loneliness at bay, to be with Alan for even one more minute.

"Oh, but you already made dinner! I'd feel awful!" Alan bit his lip, horribly conflicted. Accept his help and be a poor host, or refuse it, and watch him walk out the door.

Luckily Eric could be quite stubborn, and was already standing at the sink beginning the first dish. "Nonsense! We both ate, we'll both clean! Now come here and help me dry these!" Eric called in a voice that would be gruff to the casual observer, but Alan knew better. Eric didn't want to leave either. Smiling happily, Alan joined Eric at the sink and took the newly washed dish to dry it.

As Eric scrubbed at a stubborn spot on the skillet, a bit of soapy water splashed the front of his shirt. "Oh, wait a minute!" Alan exclaimed as he turned around and grabbed… the apron.

Eric held up his hands in protest. "Oh no! No! I'm fine really!" he said, backing away.

"Come on Eric, you don't want to ruin your shirt! Besides, I think it's rather growing on me." Alan smirked mischievously.

Eric backed into a counter, given that the kitchen, like the rest of the flat, was tiny. Unable to escape, Eric could only sigh in defeat as Alan slipped the apron over his head. "You're loving this aren't you?" was his deadpan response.

"Yep!" Alan answered cheekily.

Alan turned back to the sink to await more dishes, a playful smile on his lips, as Eric laughed softly and rejoined him. As they quietly worked together, something clicked between them. It was such a simple domestic moment, the two of them washing dishes, but it felt so… comfortable. Occasionally their hips would bump or they would brush fingers when handing over a dish, and it felt so natural, so _right_. Despite wearing the most embarrassing article of clothing ever invented, Eric felt relaxed. So relaxed in fact, that as he glanced out of the corner of his eye and noticed Alan looking away, Eric took his chance to splash the other man with warm water from the running tap, a playful smirk upon his features.

Alan gasped as the water hit him, but quickly recovered and began a counter attack. Several giggles and curses later and they were both covered in water and soap suds, laughing so hard they were crying. As the impromptu water fight died down, Alan lightly clutched Eric's apron for balance as he tried to calm his laughter.

Eric chuckled and smiled, placing a heap of soap bubbles squarely on Alan's nose. The brunette looked cross eyed at the offending suds before breaking into uncontrollable giggles once more. Laughing, Eric brought his hand to cup Alan's face and gently wiped the soap off with his thumb. With their faces inches apart and Alan smiling radiantly, still giggling softly, Eric did what simply came naturally, he kissed Alan.

The kiss was chaste and sweet, the kind of kiss you would give your lover automatically, without even thinking. As Alan's eyes flew open in shock, Eric realized just what he had done. Jerking back and dropping his hand quickly, Eric turned away, unable to meet Alan's eyes. "I… I'm sorry…. I just… it just happened and I… I should go…" he mumbled, starting toward the door.

Alan's mind was reeling. _Eric… just kissed me! Does that mean… does he…_ He was shaken from his racing thoughts as he noticed Eric mumbling an apology and making a hasty retreat. Alan grabbed Eric's wrist, stopping him in his tracks. "Eric! W-wait!" he gasped breathlessly.

Eric couldn't refuse that tone, that firm grip on his wrist, begging him to turn around. "Alan…" he whispered as he turned, whatever else he would have said dying on his lips as the sight of Alan took his breath away. Alan's eyes shown with so many emotions, emotions he was sure the other man could see reflected in his own eyes. Loneliness, confusion, longing, desire, passion… love.

Alan took a shaky step forward and brought a hand up to stroke Eric's cheek. "Don't say you're sorry Eric… please." He whispered, his hand sliding around to tangle his fingers through the blonde locks at the base of Eric's neck. "Because… I'm not." He punctuated his statement by standing on his tip toes and softly claiming Eric's lips.

Eric kissed Alan back with equal tenderness, bringing both hands up to cradle Alan's face and thread his fingers through his hair. As they pulled away and looked into each other's eyes, any remaining uncertainty was wiped away. "Alan." Eric breathed as he pulled the shorter man into another kiss, this one more demanding than the last.

As Eric crushed their lips together once more, Alan let loose a small moan and wrapped his arms around Eric's neck, pulling him closer. Eric's hands slid down Alan's sides to rest on his slender hips. The smaller man's lithe frame fit perfectly against Eric's solid body, as if he were made to be in his arms.

Eric broke the kiss to dip his head and leave a trail of kisses along Alan's jaw. As he reached Alan's ear, he nibbled on the brunette's earlobe and huskily whispered, "I've wanted you for so long Alan." before ravaging the smaller man's neck.

Alan gripped Eric's hair tightly and gasped as the other man breathed those words, words he had so longed to say and hear, hotly into his ear. "So have I Eric. More than you know." He murmured back, his breath catching as Eric's attention turned to his neck.

The taller man smiled into the crook of Alan's neck as he sucked and nibbled at the tender flesh. Alan moaned and brought Eric's lips back to meet his, boldly sweeping his tongue along the other man's bottom lip, demanding entrance. Eric gladly allowed him in as he hungrily explored the brunette's mouth. Alan shivered with desire as he felt the contrast of hot wet flesh against the cool metal of Eric's tongue piercing.

Eric's hands wandered over Alan's back as he stepped forward, pushing Alan until he was backed into the kitchen counter. Hands moved lower and cupped Alan's ass, lifting him to perch on the countertop. The freshly washed skillet was pushed aside and clattered to the floor, but they paid it no mind, both too caught up in the taste and feel of the other.

At this angle, Alan was slightly above Eric and moaned as the new position allowed him better access to his mouth. He wrapped his legs around Eric's frame and pulled him as close as possible. Both men gasped with pleasure as their growing arousals pressed together through the fabric of their trousers.

Eric hissed as he ground his hips against the other man, causing Alan to gasp and buck his hips against him in return. Alan pulled back only long enough to remove their now heavily fogged glasses and place them on the counter before pulling Eric into another kiss. Tugging Alan's neatly tucked in dress shirt up, Eric ran his hands across the smooth muscle of Alan's stomach. As Eric began unbuttoning the younger man's shirt, Alan broke their kiss to utter breathlessly, "Bedroom" before eagerly claiming Eric's mouth once more.

Smiling into the kiss at Alan's willingness, Eric slid his hands under the smaller man's thighs, lifted him off the counter and started carrying him toward the bedroom. Alan gasped in shock and wrapped his legs tighter around the other man, hanging on to Eric's shoulders. Giggling at Eric's method of getting them to the bedroom, Alan broke away to lay siege to Eric's neck. Eric moaned and nearly lost his grip as Alan preceded to ravage his sensitive flesh.

As they reached the bedroom door, Eric gripped Alan tighter with one hand while quickly opening the door with the other. After kicking the door open the rest of the way, he brought them inside and gently laid Alan on the bed, climbing on top of him and kissing him fiercely. Alan's hands worked deftly to take off the ridiculous apron and Eric's already loosened tie, then began unbuttoning the other man's dress shirt. Eric pulled back to remove the article of clothing and brought Alan up to meet him. As their tongues danced, Eric removed Alan's shirt and began exploring his chest with his fingertips.

When Alan reached for his partner's belt, Eric froze as a sudden thought came to him. It was very obvious where this path was leading them, and he was more than willing to follow it, but he couldn't hurt Alan. Eric stilled the other man's hands and panted. "Do you have any lotion… or oil?" he asked, blushing despite himself.

Alan met his eyes with a confused expression. "…no. Why?" he asked, though as soon as the words left his lips, he cleverly assessed the situation and got an idea why Eric would want such a thing. "…oh. Oh! Um… no." he mumbled apologetically, hoping Eric wouldn't stop. Alan wanted this so badly, he was certain he could take the pain.

Eric looked distressed as he met Alan's gaze. Alan was fairly humming with desire, panting and begging him with his eyes to continue. Eric wanted to, more than anything. He wanted to bury himself completely in Alan's warmth, forever claiming him as his and his alone. But he could never, _would_ never, hurt Alan. Never. Luckily an idea came to him, a sly grin spreading across his face. "Wait here." He whispered, pecking Alan's lips and dashing out the door.

Slightly confused, Alan watched as Eric ran out, only to return in a matter of seconds, triumphantly holding a bottle of… olive oil? Alan quirked an eyebrow. "_Really_?"

"It's oil isn't it?" Eric smirked, his eyes half lidded with desire.

Alan smiled and laughed at Eric's idea of resourcefulness. "So it is." he responded before reaching out to grasp the other man's hips, pulling Eric to stand at the edge of the bed. From his position kneeling on the mattress, Alan kissed and licked his way down Eric's flat stomach, tongue dipping into the other man's belly button, making him gasp. While he busied himself with learning the contours of Eric's abs, Alan's hands drifted down to un-buckle and remove the taller man's belt.

Eric's trousers looked uncomfortably tight as the fabric strained to contain his erection. Alan thought it only right to relieve those trousers of their burden. As he unfastened and slid Eric's pants off his hips to pool around his feet, Alan smirked and raised an eyebrow at Eric's lack of undergarments. He was further surprised, though he supposed he really shouldn't have been, to find Eric also had a piercing in a… much more _private_ location.

Eric was pleasantly surprised at Alan's boldness as he set about undressing him. He had always imagined that Alan would be a shy or timid lover, but the other man never ceased to amaze him. His erection twitched in excitement as Alan's warm breath ghosted over him. The brunette smiled mischievously and looked up to meet his eyes as he lightly fondled Eric's piercing with his tongue, causing him to gasp in pleasure. Alan grinned at the other man's reaction as he preceded to gently lick and nip his lover's throbbing arousal.

Panting and shaking with desire, Eric watched Alan tease him. _Fucking hell… he's so sexy! _his lust clouded mind supplied as Alan licked the slit at the head of his cock. Eric thread his fingers through Alan's hair and pulled him back, climbing on top of him on the bed. "Fucking tease." Eric breathed with a soft laugh before he brought his lips to Alan's once more.

Teeth and tongues clashed as Eric reached between them to rub Alan's aching need through his trousers. Alan moaned into Eric's mouth and arched into his touch. Fingers moved quickly to unfasten the remaining garment between them. Lifting Alan's hips off the mattress, Eric slid his trousers off, followed by his underclothes. As Alan lay bare before him, flushed and panting, Eric thought he had never seen anything more beautiful. Or more utterly fuckable. Eric pressed their bodies together and kissed Alan passionately, the delicious friction of their erections rubbing against one another making both men moan.

Eric brought a hand between them to wrap around both of their arousals and stroked. Alan gasped and quickly brought a hand to intertwine with Eric's, stroking in a slow and steady rhythm. As Alan's breathing became more erratic, Eric stilled their hands and pulled away, grabbing the bottle of olive oil.

Alan looked in Eric's eyes, and saw that the man was holding the oil and slowly moving down his body, silently asking him for permission. Threading his fingers through his lover's blonde locks, Alan smiled and laid back, completely trusting the man above him.

Eric would not betray that trust. The taller man wanted nothing more than to give Alan the most intense pleasure he had ever felt. Eric smiled at Alan's complete faith in him as he branded the smaller man's chest and stomach with hot wet kisses. Taking a nipple into his mouth, he sucked and gently nibbled on the rosy bud, making Alan cry out in pleasure. After thoroughly lavishing one with attention, he gave the second nipple the same treatment until Alan was squirming beneath him.

Eric took his time exploring his lover's body, learning which spots elicited the best reactions. Alan was a surprisingly vocal lover. He didn't scream or moan wantonly, but he was quick to gasp or giggle when Eric found a particularly sensitive spot. Just below his ribcage, the hollow of his hips, behind his knees, Eric committed all these spots to memory as he kissed his way to Alan's straining erection. He ran his tongue along it's length as he uncapped the bottle of oil. Coating his fingers, Eric spread the brunette's legs further and slowly inserted a slick digit into Alan's entrance as he simultaneously took the head of his cock into his mouth.

Alan's breath hitched as Eric licked up the underside of his member and gripped his lover's hair tightly when he took him into his mouth. The finger probing at his entrance felt odd and foreign, but not too painful. Alan trusted Eric completely and tried to focus on the wonderful things Eric was doing with his mouth.

After working one finger deep inside the other man and finding no resistance, Eric slid a second digit inside and began to slowly stretch his partner. Alan hissed at the intrusion but instantly relaxed and bucked his hips slightly into Eric's heated mouth. Using his free hand to still Alan's hips, Eric complied and took in more of his lover's length.

By the time Eric added a third finger Alan was shaking with pleasure. The fingers inside him hurt a bit, but it was a pleasant kind of burning sensation that, when coupled with the attention to his throbbing arousal, was becoming intoxicating. When he thought it could get no better, Eric's fingers slid deeper inside of him and brushed a spot that made him scream out and buck uncontrollably onto his lover's fingers, hoping to cause that amazing sensation again.

Eric hit his lover's prostate once more and Alan moaned loudly, fisting the sheets beside him and yanking almost painfully on Eric's hair. As Alan began rocking his hips onto the fingers inside of him, Eric knew he was ready. Lifting his mouth off his lover's cock and smirking, Eric locked eyes with Alan. When met with Alan's confused gaze, the other man no doubt wondering why he had stopped, Eric couldn't help but chuckle fondly as he coated his own erection in more oil.

Alan was surprised and frustrated as Eric pulled back, but as he saw him slick his member, he smiled back at his lover and opened his legs further. Eric positioned his erection at Alan's entrance and slowly pushed inside his partner's heated body. Eric's arousal was significantly bigger than his fingers had been and it caused a fair amount of pain, but Alan relaxed as much as he could and clutched Eric's back as he leaned over him and pushed in deeper.

After burying himself to the hilt in Alan's tight heat, Eric forced himself to remain still to allow his lover time to adjust. For a moment they held each other, their cheeks pressed together, warm breath ghosting over their sweat soaked flesh. When Eric thought he could hold himself back no longer, he looked into Alan's eyes as he slowly pulled out and thrust in.

Alan dug short fingernails into Eric's back as he thrust into him. The pain was quickly lessening, to be replaced with a pleasurable feeling coiling in his groin. It felt odd, being filled this way, but something about it felt good too. It was hard to tell where Alan stopped and Eric began, as Eric established a slow and steady rhythm.

Eric feared he would last an embarrassingly short amount of time at this rate. Alan was so hot and so _tight_, he couldn't remember sex ever feeling this good. As he gazed at Alan's flushed face and beautiful eyes, Eric realized with a jolt, this was _more_ than just sex. For the first time in his seemingly endless existence, he was _making love_. "Alan." he gasped, claiming his lover's lips in a searing kiss.

As the pain faded nearly completely, Alan longed for that sensation he felt before, deep inside him. Lifting his legs to wrap as high as he could around Eric, Alan ground his hips to meet his partner's thrusts. At this new angle, Eric reached deeper inside him and hit that elusive spot, causing Alan to break the kiss and cry out in pleasure. "Eric! Oh God… do that again… please…" he panted, his voice heavy with need.

Eric felt a masculine pride at being the cause of Alan's currant state, the smaller man writhing and panting beneath him. That feral grin of his slid onto his features as he used a hand to grasp Alan's thigh and lift his legs up further, allowing him to penetrate deeper. He hit Alan's prostate again and had him bucking and squirming beneath him. Eric sped up and deepened his thrusts, making Alan moan in ecstasy.

Under any other circumstances Alan would consider his rather wanton behavior embarrassing. However, as Eric pounded into him again and again, hitting that wonderful place inside of him nearly every time, Alan couldn't be bothered to care what he sounded like, as long as that amazing sensation continued. He had lost track of what he was even saying, his words a constant stream of "yes's" and "more's" and his lover's name falling off his tongue only to be swallowed up by Eric's wet hot mouth.

Alan's entire body was shaking now, Eric could tell he was close. Eric was nearing his limit as well, so picking up his pace further, he slid his hand around Alan's neglected erection, stroking him rapidly in time with his thrusts.

Waves of pleasure crested over and over inside Alan, pushing him closer to the edge, until he couldn't hold back the onslaught any longer. Crying out Eric's name, Alan held on to his lover for dear life as he allowed himself to fall into the sweet oblivion of release, letting himself be washed away by that sea of pleasure.

As Eric felt Alan's hot seed spill over his hand and across his stomach, his lover tightening and quaking around him, Eric finally let himself go. As he thrust wildly and breathed his lover's name over and over, Eric came hard and filled Alan with his essence, shuddering as immense pleasure overtook him.

Eric had just enough energy the pull out and collapse next to Alan, gently pulling the smaller man to lay on his chest. Alan happily obliged as he curled against Eric's larger frame. Eric looked down at Alan, his mind racing as to what to say now. _Are you ok? Did I hurt you? Fancy another go? … I love you. _As Alan sleepily met his eyes, he found that words weren't needed. Eric could read the answers to all his questions and a thousand more in Alan's unguarded gaze. Leaning down and kissing his lover softly, Eric smiled warmly and pulled the covers around them, already feeling the gentle pull of sleep beginning to claim him.

Alan sighed, completely content with the world. He didn't often tax his body like this, given his fragile health, but it had been well worth the exhaustion he now felt. Tomorrow Alan would tell Eric how much this had meant to him, how much _he_ meant to him, how much he loved him, but for now Alan could barely keep his eyes open. Eric was firm and warm beneath him, his strong and steady heartbeat lulling Alan to sleep.


	3. Breakfast

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

Alan groaned and buried his face in the crook of Eric's neck, wishing the alarm clock would vanish if he just ignored it long enough. In a way he got his wish, as he looked up in surprise when he heard the sound of springs and glass shattering against the far wall. Eric blinked back at him, his arm extended post throw, with a sleepily confused expression.

"Well good morning to you too… though I'm not sure my alarm clock really appreciated that." Alan sleepily murmured, laughing softly at his lover.

"Oh Jesus… I'm sorry Alan! Yeah… alarm clocks don't last too long at my place…" he trailed off as he sheepishly scratched the back of his head and blushed.

Still chuckling, Alan leaned in and pecked Eric's lips before sitting up and stretching. "That's alright." He yawned, "You just beat me to it. I've never wanted to sleep in more." Alan smiled over his shoulder.

"Mmmmm then sleep in with me. Nobody will care if we're a little late." Eric smirked as he traced patterns on Alan's exposed back.

Alan simply gave him a look that said they both knew that was bull. William senpai would have their heads if they showed up late, being as understaffed as they were. The brunette sighed and fished around beside the bed until he found a shirt. As he went to put the dress shirt on, Alan's eyes caught a gleam of yellow lying at the foot of the bed.

Laughing as his face heated up slightly, Alan picked up the bottle of olive oil. "Oh God, you realize I'm never going to be able the pan fry anything without blushing now right?"

"Then I suppose it's a good thing you couldn't pan fry anything in the first place." Eric replied with a smirk.

Alan playfully smacked Eric's chest and stuck out his tongue. "Remind me why I keep you around again?" he jokingly asked.

Eric quirked an eyebrow. "You mean besides the mind blowing sex?"

Alan laughed and replied with mock annoyance. "Well _obviously_ besides that!"

"…because I'm so damn pretty?"

Giggling at his lover's answer, Alan turned to run a hand through Eric's hair. It was completely disheveled, sticking out in every which way, one of the cornrows on the side having come loose completely. Alan smiled fondly as he toyed with the unraveled braid. "That _must_ be it."

Eric smirked and pulled Alan into a quick kiss before Alan pulled back to sit up and put on the shirt. Sighing at Alan's ridiculous insistence on getting to work on time, Eric sat up and wrapped his arms around the smaller man from behind, resting his chin on Alan's shoulder. Grinning as he planted soft kisses on Alan's neck, Eric chuckled softly. "Isn't that shirt a little big on you?"

Alan had _thought_ he felt like he was swimming in the dress shirt! The sleeves went over his hands, and with the top few buttons still undone, the whole shirt draped off to the side and exposed his shoulder. Alan blinked in confusion. "Oh! This is _your_ shirt isn't it? I'm sorry! Here…" he said in embarrassment as he began undoing the buttons.

Eric laughed and stilled his lover's hands. "Mmmm keep it. You look…" Eric planted a kiss on Alan's bare shoulder, "…incredibly sexy."

Alan blushed at the compliment and giggled as Eric's stubble tickled his neck and shoulder. "Well, be that as it may, if I wear your shirt, what are _you_ going to wear?"

"I wasn't aware I was required to wear anything." Eric murmured, continuing to shower Alan's pale skin with kisses.

Alan shivered at the attention he was receiving, until he heard Eric's words. "To work?" he asked incredulously.

"To make breakfast." Eric laughed as he moved up Alan's neck.

"You're going to cook breakfast… naked?" Alan asked, blushing at the visual.

"Why not?" Eric asked with a mischievous grin on his lips. At Alan's sideways glance of shocked disbelief, Eric chuckled. "Prude. Fine fine…" Eric laughed as he got out of bed and rummaged through the discarded pile of clothing. "Ah, here we are!"

Looking at what Eric had picked up, Alan's eyebrows shot up as he let out a bark of laughter. "You can't be serious!"

Eric raised an eyebrow and slipped on… the apron. Making a show of straightening and smoothing the fabric just right, Eric replied. "Why not? You said yourself that it was growing on you. I for one think I make this look _work_." He finished, giving Alan a playful smirk.

Alan erupted into laughter at the sight of Eric, completely naked but for the most ridiculous pink frilly apron ever made. The brunette jumped out of bed and wrapped his arms around his lover's neck, pulling him in for a quick kiss. Still giggling, Alan said the only thing that came to mind. "I love you Eric."

The smirk slid off of Eric's features to be replaced with a more tender and genuine smile. Pulling his lover close he leaned down and kissed him softly. "I love you too Alan." He whispered, his forehead resting against the other man's.

Alan's eyes lit up as he brought Eric down into a longer more passionate embrace. As he pulled away smiling, Alan's eyes gained a mischievous glint as he took in Eric's apron clad form. "Well, since you're already dressed the part, why don't you get your cute little ass in there and make your man some breakfast…" Eric jumped as Alan slapped said cute little ass, "…_baby_."

Eric grinned and bared his teeth as he laughed darkly and replied, "Oh, I'll give you breakfast!"

"Ah! Eric!" Alan yelped as Eric bent down and grabbed him behind the knees while pushing his shoulder into Alan's stomach, effectively slinging the smaller man across his back.

As Eric started for the door, Alan giggling protests along the way, he paused and walked back to the bed. Eric picked up the bottle of olive oil, reached back and handed it to Alan. "Hold this, we'll need it."

Alan's laughter rang out as Eric headed for the kitchen. Needless to say… they were late to work.


	4. Omake of DOOOOOM

William walked quickly along the streets, occasionally glancing back to make sure those two idiots were still following. One never knew when something shiny would catch their interest and veer them off course. Honestly. William would have preferred to have done this alone, but Grell had insisted on coming along, and Ronald claimed he would be bored all alone, so he had tagged along as well. Rubbing the bridge of his nose, William took some small comfort in the fact they had nearly reached their destination.

"You think Alan senpai is ok? I mean, he's never late, and he'd call in if he weren't feeling good right?" came Ronald's worried voice.

"I'm sure there is a logical explanation and nothing is wrong Ronald Knox, this is merely a precaution on account of Alan Humphries's condition." William answered in a weary tone that suggested he had already answered several questions of a similar nature during their short field trip.

"Poor Alan, it's just so tragic!" Grell cooed sadly as he wrapped himself around William's arm. "Hold me Will~!"

The only response William had to that request was a swift deathscythe to the redhead's face. Grell retreated to Ronald's company to loudly complain about their boss's heartless nature. As they approached their errant co-worker's flat, faint moaning could be heard from within. Ronald's ears perked up. Holding out his hands to stop his companions' progress, he strained to listen. "Hey! Do you guys hear that? It sounds like Alan senpai! What if he's having an attack?"

Grell raised and eyebrow skeptically. "I don't know Ronald, that almost sounds like…"

"We can argue later! He could be in trouble in there! Come on!" Ronald shouted, grabbing his colleagues' wrists and dragging them at a run to Alan's door.

William straightened his glasses after Ronald slid them to a halt in front of Alan's flat. "Ronald Knox calm down! I'm sure it's not what you thi…"

CRASH

Ronald kicked in the door and took a step inside. "Alan senpai! Are you O…k…"

His senses were assaulted upon entering the flat. The sound of bacon sizzling, the smell of freshly cooked sausage, and the sight of… Eric senpai… in a pink frilly apron… _only_ a pink frilly apron. An apron which appeared to be bunched up at the front to allow him better access to bugger his best friend, Alan Humphries, who was currently bent over the kitchen counter tightly clutching what appeared to be a bottle of olive oil and blushing as red as Grell's hair.

Time seemed to freeze as all five shinigami stared at each other, too stunned to even breathe.

... POP

"Aha… ha… toast?" Alan offered lamely, trying to lessen the awkward atmosphere. It didn't work. At all.

It did seem to knock Ronald out of his coma however. "OH CHRIST SENPAI! I-I'm sorry! It's just… we heard… and so we thought… oh Jesus…"

"Ha! You owe me 20 pounds Will~!" Grell exclaimed triumphantly.

William stomped on the redhead's foot to shut him up. As if he would ever stoop so low as to gamble on his co-workers' love lives. Honestly. Roughly grabbing his two employees by their shirt collars, William turned them around and headed outside. He turned his head slightly to speak over his shoulder, a faint blush painting his cheeks. "Ahem. Alan Humphries, Eric Slingby, you will report to my office tomorrow for your overtime assignments. Y-You may take today as a personal day. My apologies for the… interruption. Um… carry on." He mumbled, slamming the door shut and dragging his charges behind him. "Honestly Ronald Knox, we _told_ you to calm down!"

"I still see it when I close my eyes! That _apron_! Oh God!" Ronald wailed.

"Oh do shut up!" William let go of Ronald and Grell to hit the young blonde with his deathscythe… and Grell too… for good measure… after which he reluctantly reached into his jacket pocket and handed Grell a 20 pound note without looking or speaking to him. "Now come along! We have a lot of work to do, and I don't want to have overtime tonight!" William snapped and stormed off, Grell running after Will, dragging a shuddering Ronald behind him.

Meanwhile, inside Alan's flat…

As soon as the door closed Eric grit his teeth and reached for the nearest kitchen utensil, which happened to be a spatula, and growled. "I'm going to _kill_ them!"

When Eric started to pull out, Alan reached back to clasp Eric's bare ass and hold him in place. The shorter man leaned back to glare at his lover. "We can kill them later, don't you _dare_ stop now!" he threatened as he reached behind Eric's head and pulled him into a heated kiss.

Eric grinned and thrust hard and fast into Alan, making them both moan loudly. Yes, they would have to kill them later. For now Eric and Alan would finish their breakfast, because it is, after all, the most important meal of the day.


End file.
